What I Don’t Talk About When I Talk About Writing

When I talk, I don’t always speak with grammar rules intact. Maybe it’s a southern thing, maybe it’s laziness, maybe it’s habit. I write much better than I speak. My accent doesn’t mean I’m uneducated or simple. But alas, if I have something important to say, I write it. I think better with my fingers. I don’t know if that’s a testament to my writing or a result of being introverted. When writing, I do weigh every word carefully. I don’t just put junk down, unless the story or character needs it. A well-chosen word or two can make a difference between all the qualities below and the recycle bin. Learning to write was never about grammar and proper sentences to me. It’s just a given. I try my best and correct the rest in editing mode. That’s why I don’t talk about ‘the rules’ when I talk about writing.

The most important qualities to me in a story that I’ve written are: if its honest? does it have feeling? (any feeling-happy, sad, scary…) is it necessary? does it entertain, teach, have value of some sort? does it engage? would I want to read it? is it something I want to tour around and talk about endlessly? (in case the opportunity arises I want to be able to stand up for it and stand behind it).

Honesty- Is the piece is honest with the reader and am being authentic with myself? That doesn’t mean my story about a murder translates to me being evil, it means are my characters honest, do I represent them honestly? Do I want a character to find gold and be happy ever after if it’s “not realistic?” Not to pick, but the end of “Gone Girl” was frustrating, however it was honest to those characters. The end of the show “How I Met Your Mother” was not honest to the viewers. This blog is honestly how I feel about writing.

Feelings- Nothing more than feelings. You gotta have the feels.

Necessary- I wrote a piece I thought I would someday make into a novel. I had it mapped out, who would do what, when, how, the feels, all of the above, BUT it didn’t feel necessary to make these characters into anything more than a story. The characters didn’t have anything more to say than the story I had written. It didn’t meet the value mark as a novel, but did as a story.

Value/Entertain/Teach- Some novels are just for fun. Some change your life. Some can do both. They have value. I don’t want to create art just for arts’ sake. Some people do and that’s fine. But again, this is my blog. This doesn’t mean I’m a literary snob. There’s something to be said for a novel to be entertaining and take you away from reality. It’s called a break, we all deserve one sometimes.

Engage- If my story just lays there flat and people can’t remember it or take an interest in it, then it does not engage the reader. It’s like my journalism professor used to say about headlines and the first sentence. If it makes a couple at the breakfast table say, “Hey Martha did you read that?” then it is engaging. (Thanks, V. Tyson!)

Read- If a story is trying too hard, or not hard enough, has monotonous language, doesn’t relate to me and does not have any of the above qualities, I don’t want to read it. So why keep writing it?

Tour it- I wrote a couple of stories about history for kids. They were ok. They did what they needed to do. I cleaned them up in editing. Then I asked myself, “If this were to become a thing, and I had to go to bookstores to talk about it, do I really want to talk about it that much?” The answer was no. So it died that day on my computer.

Now the most important part is that I ask these questions of myself. I don’t want to ask these questions of the peanut gallery. This is according to me. Tom Turkey might feel differently about a point that I do, and I don’t care about Tom Turkey, he’s not the writer. Does that mean I don’t listen to those that have something to say about my writing? No, I am open to any worthy feedback. But these are my questions, and how I gauge my works.

What are your questions?

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Slay The Beast!

Ever wonder what goes on in a writer’s head? I’ve read sentences and thought, ‘Genius! How on earth did he/she come up with that!’

As I am supposed to be writing on a story and can’t seem to clear my head from all the thoughts in my brain, I wanted to write them down so you might better understand all the chatter that goes on. This is sometimes how I get my ideas for sentences and stories. However, most times all this chatter just sends me into the kitchen to eat something, anything!

  • Why are you even trying to write this? No one wants to read this!
  • So if I take son to said event, I can get back in time for other said event across the way.
  • I need to be _____ (fill in the blank with any random project or thing including cleaning house, reading, labeling notebooks…)
  • Even if it isn’t good I need to get it down on paper first at least to look at it.
  • Eggs, rice, toothbrush, orange juice…
  • I only have so many hours until the kids come home and then I’ll have to help with homework and activities so write it down, now!
  • Won’t it be glorious if they make this into a movie. My Oscar(R) speech will start: “Thank you so much! (point upwards) Yes, this is my real accent. Not every southerner sounds like this; only the sexy, smart ones…”
  • Oh crap,  I wanted to do such-and-such today I forgot! (Adds to to-do list after finding to-do list.)
  • I really need to lose weight, I don’t like this jiggle here…
  • Stop typing ‘just’ and ‘that’ – there are better words!!! Find function, replace…
  • But if Character A meets Character B then Character C is pointless. Argggg!
  • delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete, delete…

It’s amazing I get anything done. There are days I can end the chatter and focus, other days my mind just chats on, whether I want it to or not. I realize this is what they call resistance, inner critic, bastard… I call it annoying.

Soon I shall slay the beast that keeps my genius in chains. Today does not seem to be that day.

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Writing is Hard

Writing is hard. Creativity is hard. It isn’t hard like being a doctor and giving someone bad news, or in a I’m-saving-lives-firefighter way; but it is hard. Maybe because we make it hard. (Of course, by ‘we’ I mean me.) The struggle gets me down. Then I remember I am not my thoughts, I don’t even have to listen to my inner jerk wad.

The beginning or even deciding to start is fairly awful. You have to convince yourself maybe you can do the impossible. You can put those words down on paper in way that makes people feel, imagine, change their minds, or make the world a better place. You have to convince yourself this story you have inside you is worthy enough to be seen, read, and dare I say, even published. After that, you have to convince yourself what people say doesn’t matter. You put everything you have mentally, in word form, into that story and you put it out there for people to see. Have you seen the shaming and judging in the world today? Are you ready for that? Sometimes I am, sometimes I’m not. Oh, that doubt gets you every time. It’s like when you leave the house and keep thinking you didn’t shut your garage, but worse. Or you can just put words to paper and come what may.

There’s been way too many years I’ve spent trying to be anything but a ‘writer.’ I’ve dabbled in and mastered many types of writing; advertising, web content, newspaper reporting, they all have a wonderful place in the world, but for me it was just another means to use my writing in a mode that was considered “approved” and less risky. Guess what? It wasn’t a substitute for a good old fashioned creative story.

Writing is also something you do alone. You’re born alone, you die alone, you write that story alone. Sometimes it’s nice. Sometimes you get tired of hearing yourself compare the words ‘light’ and ‘not heavy’ to see which has a better flow with your story.

My kids know I’m now trying to accomplish something with my writing. There’s nothing better than the belief and support of elementary aged kids. They have such faith in me it makes me cry. I’ve never had my own cheering section. Part of me wonders what they will think of me if I fail. I suspect better than if I didn’t try at all. Part of me wonders how I could fail with them in my corner.

There’s also a little, squeaky voice inside me that says if I just let all this other stuff go, everything would be fine. I may not be a king of production like Jame$ Patter$on, but I could make it.

There’s a documentary from Dave Grohl called Sound City. There’s a part where he is writing and recording music with Sir Paul McCartney in his studio. Paul and Dave are rocking out and Dave says something like, ‘Man, I wish making music was always this easy.” And the ever-wise Paul McCartney says ‘It is. It is.’ 

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When Books on Writing Let You Down With Great Force

As a writer I am supposed to enjoy all forms of prose. Mostly, I do. I appreciate others’ points of view. I mean, there are thousands of ways to talk about your breakfast, alone.

“It was early, and breakfast was fast.” “Breakfast is the beginning of a glorious day in the making, so one egg will not do.” “Her breakfast was stark and bland. His breakfast had a greasy gleam that rivaled dawn’s early light.” “Breakfast consisted of cereal and three kinds of juice.” And so on, and so on… thousands of ways.

I recently read “The Writing Life” by Pulitzer Prize winner Annie Dillard, published in 1989. I love books about the spirituality of writing. I love Anne Lamott and Natalie Goldberg, Julia Cameron and many others. I had high hopes. It was lovely and full of stories, metaphors, similes, powerful images, spiritual awakenings and comparisons… and I hated it.

I wanted to relate. I understood. I ‘got it’ – I just didn’t want it.

I want to hear about the writing life. I want to hear about each writers’ experience. I don’t mind the stories, I love the stories. But this was so far out there, it felt like it never came back. From surgeons, to Zulu Warriors, from cabins to babies playing chess… maybe I was too much in my right mind to enjoy it. “I sat down at my desk and typed,” does make for a boring book, but you can’t force spiritual.

But who am I to criticize?

Has a writing book ever let you down with great force?

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Write What You Don’t Know

“Write what you know.” I’ve heard it a gazillion and three times. I still don’t believe it. If you write what you know, you never learn anything (k)new.

What if you just read what you knew? It’d be really boring and we’d all still be reading what we read in the 4th grade. What if you never met anyone new and just stayed with the friends you knew. Sure, you’d have some great lifelong friends, but you’d never have the chance to meet people from other places or find someone you with whom you really connect. Isn’t that kind of the same thing?

Probably what was meant all those gazillion and three times is if you get stuck or can’t find your way out of a story or a sentence you should write what you know and that will help the writer. However, as a writer and even as a copywriter, I can immerse myself into a different subject and become an ‘expert.’ Obviously, three weeks of learning and researching doesn’t qualify you to run a lab and conduct forensic testing, but you can learn quite a bit if you expand your horizons.

So I say write what you don’t know and then you can learn what you didn’t know. Isn’t that way more fun?

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Why I Read.

Why do I read?

10. I like to learn, experience and enjoy other people’s point of view on things.

9. At 5 or 6, I used to check out the smallest kid’s books in the library because I thought they were cute. It escalated from there.

8. A book can take you anywhere you want to go. A book can let you be anyone you want to be.

7. It’s one good habit I do have.

6. It’s fun, relaxing, exciting, and/or sometimes depressing working your way through a story, but you always grow as a person when you experience those feelings.

5. I like to see how other authors string together words and phrases to make stories. Writers have to read!

4. Humans were made to appreciate “story” in any form. I happen to like words.

3. My imagination has no limits. The big screen does.

2. It’s better than cleaning out the litter box.

#1 Why wouldn’t I???

Why do you read?

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Success for Writers According to Schrödinger’s Cat

Success for Writers: According to Schrödinger’s Cat

Author note: This is the best worst or worst best thing I’ve ever written.

Writers should look for little wins throughout the writing process. Here are some of my success points, lick, lick, to encourage you as you write the greatest piece of litter-ature of all time.

When you pull up your document and it is a purrfectly blank page, declare success! You have neither ruined it with your tedious drivel nor created the beginning of your masterpiece.

No other line can make or break your story quite as much as the first line. But no pussyfooting around, just write it down. Then, celebrate that success! It can be the worst of times, the best of times, or it can be both.

You are at the end of a vital line of dialogue from your character. A rather catty remark, too.  Do you put a question mark? A period. An exclamation! Or could it use all of them. Celebrate success before you ruin it with erroneous punctuation.

Now, you’re in the middle of your project. You are both here and there in the writing process. It’s as satisfying as coughing up a hairball and as nerve wracking as rocking chairs.

Success! You’ve finished your piece and now you must become your most evil, finicky self for the editing process. Hiss! Also, be kind to your story, mew.

Your work of art is complete and has been sent to your publication of choice. Cheers! The publication has not accepted, nor rejected you, so pounce on that hope. Remember, if the editor never responds, you have achieved total Schrödinger’s success.

Meow, get to work and create. I’m going to play in this box a while.

(Click if you weren’t up to date on your Schrödinger’s Cat information, then re-read.)

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Writing Stinks (Sometimes)

Sometimes writing and creating stinks. Not in an odoriferous way, but the emotional feeling you get when it doesn’t work out the way you planned. (Life lesson time: nothing works out as planned.)

Writing stinks when:

  1. You actually have the time and the solitude to write, but your mind is racing in every direction or you come up empty on ideas and inspiration. I liken this to when you go shopping and you have money, but can’t find anything you want to try on.


  1. You have a bazillion ideas or one really awesome one, but you don’t have time to write them down. I liken this to when you go through a store and find many items you’d love to try on and purchase, but you have no extra money.


  1. You are at the bank/school/family holiday and the banker/other moms/relatives ask what you do for a living. Because next comes… ‘So you aren’t financially stable?’ ‘Anything I might have read?’ ‘And how’s that working out for you?’


  1. There’s a profound statement your character needs to make, and it’s on the tip of your tongue/finger, but it’s not coming out right.


  1. I need to mention #1 & #2 again, because they really stink.


  1. You find half of your story is in first person and the other half is in third, and somehow it all seems passive.


  1. You get stuck on Perfectionism Circle or in This-Is-So-Bad-It’s-Easy Land.


  1. You find there’s nothing else in the world that makes you feel quite as good, or that you would ever consider doing.


When do you think writing or creating stinks the most?

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Back in the Saddle Again…(Excuses)

I have not written on my blog in ages. I’m sorry. Sometimes life truly does get in the way. Or maybe that’s just an excuse. Here’s a list of funny excuses of why I didn’t write. I do have days where my inner critic is setting me up to fail, and perfectionism, and fear, and getting sidetracked, and spam is a problem, and what would people think! And, oh well…

I honestly don’t ever not write due to makeup, fingernails or my weight. Or clowns…clowns don’t affect my ability to write. Unless they are standing behind me looking over my shoulder while I’m typing, and then that is just WAY creepy. God help me, if the clowns had balloons, too. Ugh. Okay, clowns are officially a good excuse not to write.

Nancy’s Handy-Dandy List of Excuses to Use For Not Writing

  1. My computer is having issues.
  2. My brain is having issues.
  3. My kids are having issues.
  4. My inner critic is super mean today.
  5. I want it to be perfect and it’s not, so I have to start over. Again.
  6. I need to paint my fingernails so they look pretty when they dance around on the qwerty.
  7. I am afraid I’ll offend someone.
  8. I’m afraid I won’t offend anyone.
  9. I need to lose ten pounds first.
  10. I got sidetracked by (choose one) a) social media b) reading c) errands d) the clown standing on the corner downtown e) all of the above.
  11. Kids are sick. Hubby is sick. I am sick.
  12. I’d have to put on makeup first.
  13. People will laugh at me, and then ask who do I think I am.
  14. I have so much spam on my blog it will take hours to get it all down and then post, and I have to be somewhere soon.
  15. It’s a holiday! National (fill in the blank) Day can’t happen without me!
  16. The Muse didn’t hit me with the genius stick today.

What’s your best excuse?

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Creativity Course

As a writer and a creative person, I recently finished up an online course from Penn State about creativity. (Yes, I know, seems weird, but so am I). I wanted to share with you some of the earth-shatteringly normal things I learned.

Everyone is creative. Everyone, from the mathematical engineer to the Banksy-wanna-be is creative. We are just creative on different levels and in different ways. This is based on everything about us from our experiences and intelligence (skills and talent) to our preferences and abilities. I need more structure in my creativity than someone else who prefers to just innovate with no structure/organization. Motive and opportunity also play a big part in creativity. Before you say, “Well, I never get an opportunity to create my life-size mural of Charlie Chaplin,” let me say opportunity may be that you are given the opportunity to create one on canvas first, and how you respond to creating it on canvas instead of a building is part of creativity. It’s how you respond to opportunity, not just opportunities you are given.

Let me also throw out some key words that also relate to creativity and innovation and you see if you can have your own little aha moment by reading them: Character, Entrepreneurship, owNership, Tenacity, Excellence, Relationship. There… aha! Right?

The More Failure the Better. Don’t think of failure as failure. Think of it as a way to change your idea. As a matter of fact, the faster you fail, the faster you will have a real solution. Have the courage to succeed AND to fail, as they can be one in the same.

Stop. Collaborate & Listen. Collaboration is good. It doesn’t have to be between like-minded people, it can be between those who are your naysayers. Listen to what they have to say and see if it has any validity. Change accordingly if needed but don’t compromise yourself/your idea/your product/service just to appease a constant naysayer. You have to know the difference between those who are there to help and those that want to hurt, and yes, the ones closest to you are sometimes the most hurtful ones. Tread lightly but be open.

Do you have the tools, the time, the knowledge and drum roll, please, the confidence? During this course we had to pick a project to do. My project was to do something musical I always wanted to do. We had to plan how we would achieve the goal and any problems that may occur and how we would handle them. (Jaycees, anyone?) Part of the reason I chose my goal was to also develop creative consistency (You wanna create? You gotta show up and do the work. Pressfield puts it to writers as, “Put your ass where your heart is.” At your desk, writing.) By working towards my goal, I would develop creative consistency in something and whether I would achieve the goal or not, I would still achieve the consistency I desired. If I did achieve the goal, I could build upon my success. Success breeds success for me. So what do you think happened?  I’ll give you a moment to ponder…

Confidence. So, by the second week I had already achieved my goal, so I kept expanding on it. Just like in the Wizard of Oz, it really was within me all along, I just had to believe. Sometimes in creativity the worst naysayer is really our self.

Perfection. Was I perfect? Nope, but I did it.  Creativity means also that you are willing to be imperfect.

I hope this has helped you. It’s not anything you didn’t already know. It’s just putting it into action (which is a whole different ball game).


On a different note a couple of friends and I are planning to read the United States, based on this information. 

Most famous book set in each state

Want in? However, let me go on record in saying I am disappointed in the choice for Arkansas. True Grit or I Know Why The Caged Bird Sings would have been MUCH better.




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